A Bad Day In My Life, Vol. I

Situation: Ripped My Pants

Date: March 8, 2008

The Story: My roommate, a friend and myself decide to check out a local deli that is known to have the best Ruben in town a few blocks from my house. We park in the parking lot which is adjacent to the deli. The parking lot is entirely fenced in and there are two ways to get out of it. The correct way is the long way, walk back out the entrance of the parking lot, following the outside of the fence around the corner of the street and then down half a block to the front door of the deli. The second is walk directly from your car to a two and a half foot brick wall which is right next to the front door and shimmy over. No problem, I've done this before. My buddy and my roommate hurdle with ease. My turn, I swing my first leg over and I immediately hear a massive, RRRRIIIIPPPPPPPp.. My jeans, which I just got done playing hockey at the park in and were not some Skinny Cowboy Girbaud's, tore in a U from under the crotch down close to my knee.. "Are you kidding me!!" I yelled. You could hear the tear like Willis McGahee's knee. The other two were in hysterics. Funny. Muck it up. My Charlie Brown Christmas boxers exposed. It was bad. So Thunder Thighs here had to take my jacket off and casually cover up my crotch as we walked into the restaurant and were seated. I chose a seat facing a wall not to flash other eaters and placed my jacket over my lap while we ate. Needless to say it was a bit breezy and I ordered a salad. Luckily I was not too far from my house to change afterwords.